How to get more desire

Low or no sex drive?
Hisandhers2001
Newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2015 9:07 am
Date of your marriage (past or future): August 9th, 2001
Gender: Female

How to get more desire

Postby Hisandhers2001 » Mon Jan 18, 2016 11:14 am

I'm wondering if you all might have some suggestions for me. I'm the one with LD but I'm not a refused, just don't seem to want sex or really enjoy it much anymore. We've been married for almost 15 years. He had kids and I had a kid before marriage. And we married young so for starters I do wonder if that does anything but I think the real problem comes from me. He's so sweet ever since he's been saved in 2012 and a good husband since then. But before that there were major problems. I've forgiven him and moved on and I thought it wouldn't be an issue but between those problems and then his vasectomy in 2014 that I wasn't in agreement with...I just don't know. I love him so much and I want to be more HD but I'm just not. Hubby is understanding that some may be fall out scars from before but I know it also saddens him and sometimes makes him feel like I don't desire him. Which breaks my heart. What cheap options do you all suggest?

Unfulfilled
Hammock
Posts: 1078
Joined: Wed Sep 24, 2014 3:08 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): September 5th, 1989
Gender: Male

Re: How to get more desire

Postby Unfulfilled » Mon Jan 18, 2016 12:05 pm

Complex issues her with female sexual desire.

One thing to consider is getting your hormones checked. Specifically;

Thyroid need to test BOTH: Free T4 and Free T3 as well as the obligatory TSH

Sex hormones:

Estrogen
Progesterone
Testosterone

Do NOT forget testosterone. Little known fact that a Woman has TEN times more testosterone than estrogen. That shows how strong estrogen is but also the importance of testosterone especially for sex drive. My DW is LD or maybe better described as NO Drive. And she is also BELOW range for testosterone. She however has been unwilling to go to the Dr and demand treatment.

Men who are low T and have no drive also have the same unwillingness to seek treatment and that lethargy needs to be overcome. I have so far been unable to provide proper motivation for my wife to seek treatment for her low T.

There may be a many reasons for your low drive. By testing your hormones at least would rule out one possibility. It sounds as if you are genuine in Your desire to solve the issue. and engaging and making that decision is in my opinion the biggest hurdle and biggest step which you seem to Be sincere to take. Good for you!

I'm sure many women will chime in as there are many women here who have experienced what your are and have successfully navigated the mine field. So you can learn from that experience.
Last edited by Unfulfilled on Tue Jan 19, 2016 2:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
SeekingChange
Under the stars
Posts: 5167
Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2013 12:41 pm
Date of your marriage (past or future): August 17th, 1994
Gender: Female

Re: How to get more desire

Postby SeekingChange » Mon Jan 18, 2016 12:15 pm

Do you physically have a hard time getting aroused or can you tell if it's really just a mental thing?
God can change what people do, behavioral patterns that have been in play for decades. He can change what we do to cope, find comfort, survive conflict, to count. Rahab had done a same old thing for years...then she did something new.

My Story


Return to “Lack of Desire”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users